TW: Domestic Violence, Child abuse.

I woke up with water all over me, wide eyed breathing heavily. I looked up only to see Ananya standing by my bed smiling, “What the hell?!” I exclaimed. “You love water, don't you?” She replied, her lips curling into a sinister smirk, I greeted my teeth.

“This is not the way of waking someone up.” I said, “Well I wanted to eat avocado toast so I had to wake you up, because you know naa if I’ll make it, my new nails will get ruined.” She replied with mock innocence. “You could’ve shook me up.” I countered.

“Pardon me but I don’t want my hands getting dirty by touching your dirty black skin.” There it was the constant humiliation I’d face in my own house for my skin color. My skin is not even black its brown. I try loving myself but living in a house where you get constantly humiliated for your skin color, the very thing you can’t even do anything about, how am I supposed to love myself?.

“Now stop looking at me like I am the problem, and get you—”

“YOU ARE.” I cut her off, “What?” She asked, definitely not believing what she had just heard.

“I said that, YOU ARE THE PROBLEM. Respectfully.” I repeated the full sentence for her convenience, and the way her face drained color was a sight to behold.

I then ignored her and went to freshen up, after brushing my teeth and freshening up I decided to go to the kitchen and make avocado toast for her before she makes a fuss about it and I get scolded by my aunt i.e. her mother.

While I was mashing avocados in the kitchen I heard loud noises coming from upstairs. At first I tried to ignore it because these were so normal in my house and I was just a fifteen year old girl too scared to take a stand, the noises became louder forcing me to run upstairs.

Once I reached the end of the stairs what I saw made my eyes go widen and tear up and without realizing I started shaking badly, there was a room the door was closed and just there my father and my uncle were standing looking furious and my mother was laying on the floor just outside of that door crying injured and these two monsters didn’t care the were both pulling her hair and kicking her and my mother wasn’t able to even move and every family member was just standing there watching not daring to stop them.

Both of my sisters were crying hysterically and my youngest sister ‘Naira’ who was just four years at that time was desperately trying to push my father away from my mother with her little hands but my father too far gone in his madness stepped on my four year old sister and her scream dragged me out of my panic and I ran towards them and with all my strength pushed my father away and checked Naira for any injuries but thankfully she was safe and sound, I hugged her after pulling out from the hug I wiped her tears and sent her inside with Ira ‘My middle sister’ after making sure she they both were out of sight I got on both of my knees as I was still sitting on the floor, I took a deep breath wiping my tears with the back of my hands but they never stopped flowing, I drew another long breath bracing myself for the storm I am about to unleash. “What’s your problem huh?, Why can’t you guys let this house be at peace for once?” I said looking dead in the eyes of my father my voice was a little shaky though I tried my best to not let it show. “Isha he’s your father you can’t talk to him like that.” Said my father’s youngest sister ‘Reeti’, shock palpable in her voice.

I looked at her and said, “Yes he is my father,” I chuckled but there was no humour in it, then continued, “The father who was just standing on his own four year old daughter.”

“He was angry.” She tried to reason with me. “ANGER DOESN’T EXCUSE HIS BEHAVIOUR.” I shouted on top of my lungs, making all of their eyes go wide in shock that for the first time I am not getting scared of them. “He is older than you.” She said this time more firmly.

“Exactly, he is older so he should’ve common sense to understand that what he is doing is CRIME.” I countered.

“YOU BIT—” My father said striding towards me with furious steps which to be honest scared me for a bit but my uncle stopped him and took him away after they left my attention went to my mother who was still laying on the floor injured I helped her and took her to my father’s and her shared bedroom.

After bandaging her wounds and giving her medicines I went back to the kitchen to finish making the avocado toast and gave it to Ananya, after that I went to get ready for school. I packed my bag with my swimming essentials as I had a swimming tournament to participate in and as usual I didn’t tell anyone in the house about it because if I did they would never let me participate.

—

Upon reaching school first I went to my classteacher to inform him that I’ll not be attending any of my classes today as I have a tournament. When I was going towards the swimming area I bumped into Aalok, “ohh, H-Hii.” I said nervously, And before he could reply Smriti popped up from behind him, “Hi, Isha.” She said, a sweet smile plastered on her face. “Hello.” I replied, forcing a smile, and before I could say anything else she hooked her arm into Aalok’s and dragged him with her.

I shook my head with a sad smile and left for the swimming area.

Once I reached there I went and changed into my swimming clothes and met my coach who wished me luck as the tournament started I won this was going to be my like sixteenth time winning such tournament but I am not happy at all and no its not because I’ve already won many awards both academically and in swimming too but because I don’t have anyone to share this happiness with, upon reaching the finish line I looked at the audience hoping to see Aalok or my best friends cheering for me,

There was no one.

But I had eye contact with a guy who was sitting in the audience clapping happily looking at me but I shrugged it off because I don’t even know this guy why would he be cheering for me?

I got out of the pool and went to receive my trophy.

After the tournament when everyone left the swimming area I was sitting by the pool alone. My legs were under water. I was swinging them, the trophy was in my hand and I was looking at it with tears in my eyes.

“Another tournament,another trophy but still no one to celebrate it with.” I muttered to myself a tear sliding down my eye.

“I can’t tell at home that I won this in a swimming tournament, because they absolutely despise if I do anything except studying, and my friends? I don’t know where they are. I haven't seen either of them since this morning. As for Aalok…” A dry chuckle left me, “Must be busy with Smriti.” My voice, barely above a whisper.